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Not surprisingly the largest category in this book, it offers an excellent gauge to the reverent size of Ego in Guydom. This preoccupation with something more stealthy than today's most advanced military hardware, we will protect and defend it with no less tenacity than the military (see "guerilla ego"). The balancing act that we have to maintain between our egos and what we know to be reality is often difficult and riddled with mistakes. One might assume that we keep our well-preened egos in shape to impress the opposite sex like a peacock in full bloom, but as is often the case, they come into play more during a Guy's interaction with other Guys. Woman are, and have been, fully aware of this whole ego thing from the start, and have been able to put it into perspective with men. Guys, on the other hand, continue to misread and react to poorly gathered information, leading to some ruffled feathers at times. The Ego serves as our protective shield from homophobic situations where men need to establish that they're men. This seemingly undaunting task turns out to be, for a lot of Guys, a full-time job. Anti-Homophobic tactics and displays are needlessly repeated and understood on the part of all Guys. Whether it is simply acknowledging another Guy's presence or recovering from a knee-to-knee contact, we are constantly trying to establish our place in the Ego-Asylum.

Category: Ego

Guyrule #3.1 Giving Help When any of your buddies is do… Guyrule #4.0 Do it Yourself! "Anything that possibly can be… Guyrule #11.0 Crushing of the Can "If you've got a buddy over, a… Guyrule #13.0 Different Good-byes "Different Good-byes depend on… Guyrule #21.0 Project Ego "There's a direct relationship… Guyrule #23.0 Hasty Quality? "Finishing first is a bonus, b… Guyrule #29.0 Acknowledging the Hello "At what point do you acknowle… Guyrule #29.1 Sidewalk Control "When walking alone toward ano… Guyrule #31.0 Token Protests "Token Protests. A guy's doing… Guyrule #33.0 Taking Breaks "It's quite acceptable for the… Guyrule #45.0 Trumping the Bullshit "If you know a guy's talking a… Guyrule #48.0 You've Gotta Admit "There's always that point in … Guyrule #48.1 Admit It When you fuck up you take the … Guyrule #50.0 I-Just-Blew-My-Cool "There's always the I-Just-Ble… Guyrule #56.0 Examining the Project When Finished "After you've finished the pro… Guyrule #76.0 The Best Buy and Most Famous Person "Every single guy has got thei… Guyrule #79.0 Words that are Banned on the Project Site "If you're really in a guy sit… Guyrule #81.0 Keeping Your Cool When You're Late "Even when you're really late … Guyrule #86.0 A Captain Picard Guy Rule "This Guy Rule come directly f… Guyrule #92.0 Different Sets of Directions "Every guy has got his scale o… Guyrule #105.0 I Beat the Sales Guy "Every Guy has got the I-Bough… Guyrule #107.0 Swimming Pool Rules "When you're at the swimming p… Guyrule #112.0 Pissing in the Wild "When two guys have to piss in… Guyrule #116.0 Rip Cord "The 'Rip-Cord' Guy move is wh… Guyrule #119.0 Urinal Etiquette "When in the men's room, if so… Guyrule #119.1 Urinal Etiquette "When entering into a bathroom… Guyrule #119.2 Urinal Etiquette "While at a urinal, look direc… Guyrule #119.3 Bathroom Socializing "When peeing at stalls in a ba… Guyrule #119.4 Urinal Etiquette "Always look straight ahead wh… Guyrule #119.5 Urinal Conversations When relieving yourself at the… Guyrule #119.6 Public Restrooms: The Wall Stare When using a urinal in a publi… Guyrule #119.7 Complete Unbuckle at the Urinal There are only two ways to use… Guyrule #119.8 Urinal Don'ts When two guys enter a bathroom… Guyrule #119.9 Urinal Threat When you're the first on in an… Guyrule #119.10 More on Public Urinals When forced to use a urinal ju… Guyrule #119.11 Bathroom When you are out and have to u… Guyrule #127.0 Men's Room Etiquette "We all know that when women g… Guyrule #127.1 Men's Room Door Never hold the door for the ne… Guyrule #131.0 Locker Room Shower Etiquette "When taking a shower in a loc… Guyrule #139.0 Urinal Etiquette (Australia) "When in a public urinary alwa… Guyrule #145.0 Bathroom Etiquette "When taking a shit, whether i… Guyrule #154.0 Crying "Guys can only cry when trying… Guyrule #155.0 Respect in the Steam Room "Like building the fire, opera… Guyrule #158.0 Car Stereo Installation "When installing a car stereo … Guyrule #159.0 Bluffing "When showing a female how to … Guyrule #164.0 Asking For Directions "A real guy will never ask for… Guyrule #173.2 One-Seat Spacing When choosing seats at the bal… Guyrule #176.0 Dad Genuflection "When you come over to your da… Guyrule #179.0 Shoulder Game "When you're walking down a na… Guyrule #181.0 Showering in the Locker Room "You're in the locker room abo… Guyrule #181.1 More Locker Rooms When changing clothes in the l… Guyrule #181.2 Lockerroom Eyes When in a lockerroom, you must… Guyrule #183.0 Watching a Movie on TV "When you are watching a reall… Guyrule #188.2 T.V. Control The home is the guy's castle o… Guyrule #188.6 House Rules The man of the house has any a… Guyrule #192.0 Injuries "It's very important that if y… Guyrule #192.1 Injuries: The No-Witness Clause When a guy gets an injury and … Guyrule #195.0 Injuries "It's very important that if y… Guyrule #201.0 Shaving Comments "It is never acceptable for an… Guyrule #201.1 Closeness of a Shave If a buddy asks you to feel ho… Guyrule #214.0 Sell that move! "What ever move you commit to … Guyrule #222.0 Pumping Iron "At the gym, the amount of wei… Guyrule #232.0 Music From Popular Bands "If a buddy says that he likes… Guyrule #238.0 Deep Thinking "During deep thinking groups o… Guyrule #240.0 Guys Don't Drink Hot Tea "It is unacceptable for a guy … Guyrule #248.0 The Bright Side "There is always something tha… Guyrule #259.0 Bus Etiquette Upon entering a bus or train, … Guyrule #287.0 Taking your own medicine When illness occurs, most guys… Guyrule #292.0 Coffee Guys drink black, caffinated c… Guyrule #304.0 Working for Exams When working for exams, be the… Guyrule #312.0 Porno Flicks/John Holmes Exemption When a bunch of guys are watch… Guyrule #334.0 Letting a Guy out of a Bet You can let a guy out of a bet… Guyrule #336.0 Earn Your Slice of Guydom Never give another guy the log… Guyrule #375.0 Public Pain When you're with a group of pe… Guyrule #383.0 Public Restroom Departure When two guys, who know each o… Guyrule #396.0 Manly Dogs vs. Cats Without question, some dogs ar… Guyrule #425.0 It's Not a Penis Guys should never refer to the… Guyrule #433.0 Weightlifting Ego No guy should ever razz his bu… Guyrule #434.0 Spam-Inducing GuyRule Submissions No real Guy will submit a rule… Guyrule #435.0 When Asked About Other Men When ever a guy is asked by a … Guyrule #453.0 Boastful Stories It is the God-given right of a… Guyrule #458.0 Purse Holding When in a public place, such a… Guyrule #462.0 Rules and Manuals Never under any circumstances … Guyrule #466.0 Clean Feet When you're taking a shower in… Guyrule #467.0 Introduced to A Guy by Your Girlfriend When being introduced to anoth… Guyrule #473.0 Holding a Purse It is permissible for a guy to… Guyrule #479.0 The Color Never to Wear Real Guys do NOT wear the colo… Guyrule #484.0 Crying at the Movies Guys cannot cry while at the m… Guyrule #508.0 Avoid Feminine Music Under no circumstances must an… Guyrule #512.0 Inflated Job Title When discussing your job with … Guyrule #512.1 Concealed Weapons If you have a buddy who has a … Guyrule #513.0 Stair Etiquette When either by yourself or wit… Guyrule #515.0 Getting Punched If you know you are about to g… Guyrule #520.0 Double Occupancy It is never, I repeat, never o… Guyrule #535.0 Farting in the Tub A guy that thinks it's funny t… Guyrule #540.0 Handshake It is only allowed to shake an… Guyrule #551.0 Pissing Under no circumstances, EVER, … Guyrule #555.0 New cars: Under the Hood When you buy a new car, and as… Guyrule #556.0 Soap No self respecting, heterosexu… Guyrule #562.0 Sunscreen No guy will ever rub sunscreen… Guyrule #563.0 Your Three Stories Every Guy must have at least t… Guyrule #572.0 Condom Purchase In the unlikely event you are … Guyrule #586.0 Passing on the Right Never, EVER let some punk pass… Guyrule #587.0 Appearance A man should not comment on an… Guyrule #590.0 Anonymous Submissons Anonymous submissions are alwa… Guyrule #591.0 Gitch Shall Not Touch Mine When living with a Guy roommat… Guyrule #595.0 Quote Heres a great thing I've heard… Guyrule #597.0 Thou shalt not quote Hamlet No guy should ever quote Hamle… Guyrule #599.0 BandAid WWhen a guy has cut himself it… Guyrule #622.0 Types of 'Legal' Tattoos Real guys should not wear tatt…